In a television event dreamed about for years, the long-awaited All Winners Season is upon us. Eight previous winners of Drag Race and All Stars will compete in All Stars season 7 for the title of “Queen of All Queens.” Move over, Elizabeth II and Ross Matthews!
First into the werkroom is Shea Couleé, winner of All Stars season 5. Bedecked in orange, she didn’t know she needed an introduction! Since winning, she has had three Vogue features and walked the Savage X Fenty fashion show. Next is Jaida Essence Hall, the winner and trade of season 12. The “Essence of Beauty” lip synced for her crown from her own living room due to COVID restrictions. Her signature line: “Look over there!” She’s back “bigger, badder and better” than ever.
What is that evil laugh? It’s Yvie Oddly, winner of season 11. The “Cackling Crown Creative of Colorful Chaos” is ready to show everything! She nearly suckled herself! As Alyssa Edwards once noted, “Oh, she’s got flexibility.” Yvie’s new moniker is “Queen of the Queerdos.” Our next competitor is All Stars season 4 co-winner Trinity the Tuck. One of life’s great mysteries is where she puts “it.” She’s “snatched, pulled and ready for action!” This time around she wants her own reign, which is the cue for our next queen…
…Monét X Change, the sponge queen, twinner winner chicken dinner of All Stars season 4 with Trinity. Remember, she says, “Monét changes everything!” She has two successful podcasts, Sibling Rivalry and the X-Change Rate, and hosted the Pit Stop for recently completed season 14. She notes that the werkroom has been enlarged, and all agree it’s for their egos.
Jinkx Monsoon, winner of season 5, enters and strikes a pose with the immortal words, “Line?” She’s an “internationally tolerated drag queen superstar” who has written some fabulous comedy shows. No one can forget her winning performance as Little Edie on Snatch Game! Next to last, Raja, winner of season 3, enters the werkroom. It’s been over ten years since her season. As she says, she’s “OG AF.’ She has appeared on runways and in one woman shows, as well as co-hosting Fashion Photo Review. These two are veteran early season champs and are ready to take on these Joni-come-lately children!
And finally, from across the pond, we have Drag Race UK season 1 winner The Vivienne. We can call her Viv, she says, because “Vivienne is quite a mouthful,” or “so she’s been told.” Michelle Visage declared her Trump character the greatest ever on Snatch Game. Viv has a Netflix show and tours the world. It’s a British invasion, she says, “like the Beatles.” And yes, she adds, “The British do love coming!”
A ninth mystery queen arrives under a large hat. It’s Raven, twice “robbed” of the crown and now Ru’s makeup artist. Ru kicks her out with love and then explains to the “pick of the glitter” the season’s rules. The big twist: no one will be eliminated! Each episode will yield a top two who will receive a Legendary Legend star. They will lip sync for their legacies with the winner receiving $10k and the power to block a queen from receiving a star the following week. The four queens with the most stars at the end will face off in a lip sync LaLaPaRUza to determine the Queen of All Queens. Got that?
Ru declares the library open for some iconic reads. Jinkx slays and wins with reads like “Jaida, look over there! It’s the exit!” and “Monét, it’s not fair you’re always compared to Bob the Drag Queen. Bob is very talented.” Snap! In the maxi challenge, the queens will write verses and develop choreo for a new Ru song, “Legends.”
Next up is another surprise visitor on the runway: supermodel Naomi Campbell! Shea is beyond thrilled. Naomi gives the queens some advice on runway walks with props to Viv and Yvie, but she gives her highest praise to Shea: “Perfection.” Shea is overwhelmed and so was I! Naomi reminds Ru that she walked a Versace show in 1990 to “Supermodel.” Legendary.
The queens prep their verses and select Shea to lead the choreography. On runway day, the topic turns to blocking strategies, with Monét and Trinity appearing to forge an alliance (you save me, I save you). Ru performs a new song, “Give ‘Em What They Want” and then introduces the maxi challenge number, “Legends.” Basically, Ru introduces Ru to perform Ru and then have the queens perform Ru! It’s not Michelle Visage’s Drag Race!
On the runway, the category is “I’m Crowning” with Cameron Diaz as guest judge. Raja “goes for baroque”; Jinkx conjures “there’s something about Mary… Queen of Scots”; Monét sports tracksuit realness; Trinity crushes the velvet; Yvie’s in crayon, not rayon; Viv serves Vivienne Westwood; Jaida’s in a beehive and Shea serves Nefertiti with a crown of braids, which Carson Kressley declares the best lewk in Drag Race herstory!
The top two of the week are Shea and Monét who lip sync to a very jazzy “Old MacDonald” by Ella Fitzgerald. That farm was happening! It’s sheer perfection, with Shea slaying it and winning. She is given the “Platinum Plunger” which she will hand to the queen she has blocked: Trinity the Tuck. I’d say Trinity was cock-blocked, but that would be redundant.
It was a fabulous, “entertainting” episode and makes clear it’s going to be a legendary season. Who could expect less from all winners? This was a double episode, so read my recap of episode 2! See you next week!
Photo credits: Paramount+